Sunday, January 24, 2010

Zombified but still Alive

Work has totally eaten up all my time. I even went into work on Saturday for a few hours to kick out some work that I knew I'd never get to complete otherwise. I feel awful because I want to have a good work/life ratio where I actually, like...live. Like, a LIFE.

So with that said I don't want to stress any more about it than I already do when I wake up at 5am stressed out about how I should load XYZ file as soon as I get in the office Monday.

I roll my eyes just listening to myself. It's so uninteresting but I'm drained and I'm a horrible updater as a result. I'm also a horribly inconsistent chef and my husband has on, more than one occasion, been left eating olives and crackers because there is nothing pre-made for him. I'd feel bad, but if he wanted to he could always fry up some eggs and toast but he is not that person. He's more of a "if there is nothing I can reheat in the microwave there is nothing to eat" fellow. I think he'd rather resort to eating all the pickles and drinking all the milk before venturing to pull out a frying pan.

I'm been racking my brain trying to think of easy food to make, but that would require going to the grocery store and getting appropriate ingredients. Normally I wouldn't mind it, but since we're perpetually on the fence of moving due to this house thing I don't want to buy more food if I can avoid it. In fact I've been trying to find ways to squeeze beans, salsa, tomato sauce and pasta into everything.

In other news, since I've been promoted up to Matron of Honor (MoH) by my friend Lex. I'm trying to rally the troops and make a bachelorette gameplan. So far we're throwing around some really fun ideas. I think it's a good mental distraction from my own life to refocus and think about someone else and something positive I can do. Sometimes when you feel powerless and confused in our own life you just got to keep moving, keep going, and refocus on something you do have control over.

Since she's a reader I'm not going to spoil my plans by sharing them with the internets but I will admit that I'm a little neurotic in that her wedding isn't until June and I have a ton of time left to get all the girls on one page. I certainly don't want to plan on say, taking a group of balding guys to the salon. Or taking vegetarians to a BBQ joint. You gotta play to your audience.

Due to some unforeseen circumstances, Alexis's is the only wedding on my schedule for 2010 and I want it to be amazing for her. Particularly because I know that they aren't in a position to throw money around, I want to give her something excessively special...if that's even a thing. EXCESSIVELY special. Not just that I bought her an expensive gift. Anybody with a credit card can do that. Having a supportive system of friends looking out for you, keeping you happy and playing interference when Uncle Larry is behaving a little extra grabby is priceless. It's better than a million Dyson vacumes.

So while I'm painfully stressed out, anxious, and stretched thin I do find pleasure in the little things. I have to. I couldn't make it through the day otherwise.