Thursday, August 20, 2015

Like that time I wiped my butt

Internet, I cut my hair.

Lacking a twitter or an instagram you probably had no idea and probably didn't care. I typically don't care when other people go to the barber or shave or eat food or wipe their bottoms or have a cold either. Actually I especially don't care when people have colds. I would prefer you keep even the notion of illness far far away.

I mention it because it's my 2nd time donating hair and THIS time I was prepared. In case you aren't the photographic memory type I donated about 6 years ago.  (And yes, I went from a short 'do all the way to long again in that short a span of time.) I had all my stuff ready. I had a rubber band on my wrist ready for the ponytail making so I could shove that hair in the plastic zip bag I had ready so it wouldn't get yucky or wet. I also even had the mailing envelope ready with the address to mail it to already on the front.  I felt well prepared to give up my hair and happy that there would be no dilly dallying!  As a mom of two who can't even go to CVS without conferring with my schedule I need things to be ready in order for them to go off without a hitch.

Oh That's all anyone cares about right?  We're a "too long, didn't read it" society now.

It's not anything I'm scared of since I have had short hair before and it neither makes me any more or less feminine to have a few feet of hair hanging off my scalp. To be honest all I ever did with my long hair was pull it back into a bun or braid it back from my face so it'd stop being in my way and my baby would stop using it as a teething toy.  I wasn't LOVING my hair as a device of beauty and someone else most certainly would.  It was an easy choice to let it get as long as I could bear and give it away.  There's a point where I do LOVE long hair and I feel like I'm rocking out Victoria's Secret style waves and clearly owning the world like a boss but like, 2 inches past that point and I feel like it's a rats nest and there's no way a comb will ever go through it and whoa is it ever looking witchy.  It's a super small window of enjoyment for me.  I guess it doesn't help that by the time it got to that point I had a teething child and he kept on chewing on my braid. Seriously. I doubt that helps one's hair grow in healthy. By the time it was long enough to provide a good 9 inches to wig people my hair was down to the small of my back. I don't have the small delicately feminine features necessary for a pixie so I tolerated my hair almost falling down to my posterior before the madness kicked in and I needed it cut.  My face is okay, I like it fine but it just doesn't have that delicateness where a pixie looks charming. This is not a complaint, it's merely an acknowledgement.

Some friends have noted what a kind gesture it is.  Since my hair grows out of my head for FREE I think saying I'm generous is a bit of a stretch. Mother Theresa I am not.  I merely have a good batch of genes for hair growing and the luck of having healthy enough undyed tresses that wig people can do something with it. If left unchecked with more conservative trims I could probably grow all that hair back in 4-5 years.  I probably will try and continue the trend of growing and donating until I find large patches of gray hair I can't stand seeing...but even then who knows? I might love my gray hair.  I love all kinds of random things other people don't like so you can't ever rule it out.

No one will ever notice if I forget to wear eyeliner but chop off my hair?  Everyone I've run into recently can't stop telling me about it.  Yes, I know, I'm the one who decided to get it cut. I think it's nice they care of course but there's not much chit chat I have about hair other than I decided to do this and once I make up my mind there's no turning back.  I am surprisingly terrible at small talk, especially about myself so the conversation ends right in it's tracks.  I should make flash cards for myself to keep it from veering right into "Thanks...(silence) Okay, bye."

I have resisted shorter hair in great deal to the fact that I didn't want to get pigeon holed into "mom hair" that is functional and unstylish.  But the reality is that super long hair that isn't kept up just ends up looking flat and lifeless and greasy anyhow.  No one ever looked at a woman with a messy ponytail and said "yes! That is what I have been looking for! I need to know what you did to get that look." You deserve to look good and feel positively about your appearance.  You spend tons of time and money on the kids and you deserve to not look like the greasy ill-dressed babysitter following behind them.  Obviously if the bill collectors are banging down the door, keep your priorities in check but I think it's easy to fall into the trap of not having enough time and energy to care about yourself because you've been so busy taking of others.